And We'll Play Crack the Sky

We sent out the S.O.S. call.

When we thought we could run, it was more like a crawl.

And when I decided to get away from it all,

It was less like a crawl and more like a fall.

They call 'em rogues. They travel fast and alone.

You were a rogue, the way your eyes shone.

This conversation, its head has been blown.

And from the beginning, I should have known.

Four months at sea, four months of calm seas.

The tides were so low when they hit my knees.

Although it may seem I’m speaking of the sea,

The matter at hand is you and me.

This story's old but it goes on and on until we disappear,

What we’ve tried to end has become what we fear.

Somehow four months turned into a year.

And who would have guessed we’d still be standing here.

One hundred foot faces of God's good ocean gone wrong.

It was sure to be over, it was all along.

And as we both just tried to be strong,

All I can hear in my head is this song.

Looking for the Light at the End of the Tunnel

A fictional memoir from a Chilean miner who was a part of the 2010 Copiapó mining accident:

We’ve been counting the days. All of us putting a small mark on the tally in our head. It makes us think that with every day that passes, maybe we’re getting closer to getting out of here. That may or may not be true, but the positive attitude is what gets us through the day.

Sometimes during the day I get distracted enough to forget I’m trapped. I can fool myself into thinking it’s just a normal day at work. We break into groups, we are assigned tasks, and we work the day in the mines. But where we would normally break for lunch, or to go home for dinner, there’s nothing to eat. Rationed food every 48 hours just doesn’t compare. Especially not to my wife’s home cooked meals. That’s another thing that makes me remember I’m trapped. I sleep on a hot damp floor instead of in a peaceful house with my family.

I’ve never felt like this before. So dirty, so greasy, so thin, so unhealthy. I can’t tell if there’s permanent physical damage to my body, I can’t even tell what I look like. I wonder if my eyes will ever adjust to the sun again, or if I’ll have to lead a life of darkness. I wonder how long it’s even possible for us to survive down here. With the food we have it doesn’t seem like more than 70 days or so would be possible. But none of us have died so far. And I’m just going to tell myself that’s the way it will keep going.

This is a test most others won’t experience in their lifetime. And it’s not even as much a physical test, as it is a test of mental strength. Our main goal down here is to keep up the morale, because with that, we’ve lost everything. Urzúa told us the only thing a positive attitude can do is help us, and I’m sticking to that. I will keep images in my head of the things I love about life, and the things I will soon return to. I will be a part of not only a support system, but a family I have now become a part of. And I will tell myself, above all, that if I survive this, I can survive anything.

Week 3 Peer Review

Skylar:

I really enjoyed your posts this week! “Rationale Affected by Ego - An Autobiography of Nick Miller” was my favorite. You completely got into character of being someone else. The fact that you could abandon your previous writing style for another was very impressive. Also for that post, I like the fact that you added the thought dialogue by using italics. It makes the reader feel even more like they’re in Nick Miller’s brain. “Bumper Meets Knees” was also a very good post, I like the approach you took. You built the scene up with simple events until the very end, when you shock the reader with a terrifying event. At first the reader thinks it’s just about a simple afternoon, but the twist at the end really changes the vibes from the piece, in a good way.  

Matthew:

“The Autobiography of Jeremy V” was a really great post. It kept my attention the entire time, I was constantly guessing what was going to happen. Your description of Steve was humorous and spot-on; I could picture his movements and behavior in my head. “In My Youthful Kitchen” also displayed good writing, the beginning really set the mood for the rest of the post. I also really liked your use of dialogue to bring life to the story. Details through dialogue is one of my favorite ways as a reader to really get into a piece. You get very deep into your stories and always leave the reader satisfied, definitely keep up the good work!

Chelsee:

The post about your childhood kitchen was just adorable. The way you talked about Santa really puts the reader back to that time in your childhood. I also like the fact that in the autobiography post you took a little bit of a different approach than others by giving some factual information on your person. This was very helpful to understand the rest of the post. By adding more specific details though, you can really bring a lot of color to your work. The enthusiasm and idea content are all there, you just need a little more brightness to really make your work shine. Other than that, your topics are always interesting and heartfelt, which is a very enjoyable aspect of reading your work.

Mariama:

Your writing is very personal, and that’s an aspect of it you should never lose. When talking about how you didn’t have a kitchen growing up, I felt very connected to your story by the way you described it. It’s so interesting to see other people’s perspectives who have grown up differently than I have, and I know I’ll enjoy reading your work throughout the semester. One tip I might give you is to interpret your work a little more. Although the straight facts are still interesting, hearing more of your thoughts and emotions towards your subjects will bring your writing to a new level. Taking chances and being brave in writing is what makes it great sometimes; don’t be afraid to push boundaries and your writing will soar. Sometimes it’s hard to find the right words to say, but the honesty of saying exactly what’s on your mind would be really great for these posts.

The Autobiography of ?

The misses came in this morning to tell me she was going into town for some shopping, but that I was still expected to get my work done even though she wouldn’t be there to watch me. Watch me? Is that what she calls it? Well I call it her sitting on the porch drinking sweet tea while I work in her fields. Yeah, she may look over at us once in a while, but that don’t mean she’s watchin’. It just means she ain’t got nothing better to do that day because her hair didn’t take as long to curl. That’s one thing I got on her; my hair curls just fine.

It seems hotter than usual today. Not a cloud in the sky to save us from that sun. We all like to call our sun hats our “best friends” because they’re the only things that keep us from getting burnt right through to the skull. It’s about damn time I got a new one, though. There’s holes in the sides and it’s starting to smell something god-awful. I’m hoping to get down to the creek sometime this weekend. Lord knows we could all use a bath, and some laundry done.

The thing that gets me through the days mostly are my thoughts. I put myself somewhere else – anywhere else – but here. Someplace where they’re the ones serving me. And if I come home after a long day of fishin’, there’s somebody there to rub my damn feet. Someplace I don’t need a home with fields like these, I can just have a grassy area to roam. And even though that ain’t the truth, and may never be, at least I have the picture of it to get me through the day.

She’s home. Ready for her the old man to read her a nice little story while she drinks her sweet tea on the porch. I’ll picture me in her shoes tomorrow, and it’ll be enough to get me through the day.

A Childhood Kitchen

The carpet was brown and the tile was speckled. And although my parents knew these weren’t the most attractive decorative decisions, having two young children and a dog meant lots of messes. So why not have flooring that covers those stains? Along with this theme, my mother was almost always cleaning the kitchen. One night I insisted to do the dishes after dinner, and ended up accidentally using an entire bottle of dish soap. Don’t ask me how it happened, I couldn’t tell you. All I remember is that my mom was still grateful I had tried to help.

Two facts about me when I was a child: I hated taking my vitamins, and I was sneaky. Every night during dinner, my mother would put chewable vitamins on my plate next to my food. They always ended up gone, so she always assumed I had eaten them. They disappeared alright, but they didn’t go to my stomach. We had an old heater whose system lined the bottom of our home, all around the dining area and near the kitchen. There were small spaces in the heater; small spaces where small things, such as vitamins, could be stuck. I would wait until my parents weren’t looking, and then slide the vitamins into the heater. It was genius, right? They’ll never find them there!

Wrong. Months after this had been going on, my dad started a project to clean the heater. All of a sudden, about 60 vitamins fall out of it and into his hands. Of course they knew it was me – my sister loved the taste of Flintstone’s vitamins. I immediately broke down and started apologizing, hoping they’d take pity on me. But all they could do was laugh. After I got over the initial shock I wasn’t in trouble, I was laughing too. The four of us. Just sitting there laughing. It’s moments like these I love my family, because whether I use up an entire bottle of dish soap, or stuff an entire bottle’s worth of vitamins in the heater, they never fail to see the good and the humor in situations.

Cold Conscience

One moment we were heading home from work, and the next I’m wondering if I’ll live to see another day. I know what happened. I know exactly what happened. We were heading home from work, just Dan and I, taking the back road late at night. The road never seemed so empty before. Not until Dan hit a patch of ice and the car got stuck in a snow bank. Not until we couldn’t dig the car out of the snow. Not until I realized it was negative thirty degrees. Not until then, did I realize how empty that road was.

There was nothing for miles in either direction. If we tried to walk to civilization, we’d freeze. If we stayed in the car, we’d freeze a little slower. So, the car it was. At first we just tried to convince ourselves that someone would come. Someone had to come. Someone had to know that two 25 year old men, who didn’t deserve to freeze to death, were out there. But as the seconds turned to minutes, and the minutes turned into too many to keep track of, I began to worry. Everything went numb. I couldn’t tell if I was being paranoid or if I could really feel my insides shutting down. And then there it was.

A light. But what was it? Was it the entrance to the pearly gates, had the cold finally got me? It wasn’t heaven, but what it was could have surely been the work of an angel. A large truck coming down the road, coming straight for us. The truck was big enough to pull our car out and tow it back to civilization. He didn’t even know we were out there. He just happened to be taking the back way as well.

Dan and I couldn’t stop staring at our driver on the way home. He was a savior, disguised as a rugged truck driver that desperately needed a shower. I’ll never forget the luck of that scruffy old man finding us that day. That’s when I started to believe in fate. That’s when I started to believe that I had a purpose here. The cold would have eventually got us if we hadn’t been rescued, and we would have died. But dying in a beat up station wagon wasn’t my fortune that day. And I’m willing to spend my whole life finding out why I was spared.

Week 2 Peer Review

Skylar:

You’re very good at descriptions – I can really see the things as you describe them in your work. The use of analogies in your work really shows your creative side. You’re able to write about things exactly how they are, which gives the reader a very good idea of where you’re coming from. Especially in “Overbearing Observations”, I really got a feel for your writing. Readers can tell you’re intelligent and organize your thoughts well. The only critique I might have is to possibly analyze a little more – which you definitely do to some extent, it’s not absent. A reader can see what you’re talking about, but they might want to think about it on a little bit of a different level.  

Matthew:

First off, I enjoy the fact that you wrote about Alaska (I grew up in Anchorage). It definitely brings me back. Second, I really enjoy the emotion in your writing. It’s obvious you care about and know a lot about the things you say, and that comes through to the reader. A particular line, from “Describing an Individual,” I really enjoyed: “This aging adds to the beauty of her personality the same way a rich patina adds immeasurably to the beauty of sculpted antiques.” That was definitely heartfelt and sincere, while also adding a great comparison. If I had anything to criticize, it might just be that the “Observing the Countryside” entry was a little too long. There were many interesting observations, but not all of them might have been necessary for one entry. Maybe by picking out the best and most vivid details, it could help the writing run a little smoother.

Chelsee:

Putting the quotes at the beginning of each entry is a really cool way to set the mood for what you’re writing about, I really like it. I also like how much your personality shines through when you write – when you were talking about the “spaghetti vs. macaroni” debate, I almost laughed out loud. Examples like these show your sense of humor and brightness. Your writing is very smooth and fun to read, but my criticism would be to maybe add a little more depth. Possibly a few more analogies or out of bounds observations would add more to your already vibrant writing.

Mariama:

Couldn’t access blog? Said the following when I clicked on the link, and there was no other content really.

“You are viewing a feed that contains frequently updated content. When you subscribe to a feed, it is added to the Common Feed List. Updated information from the feed is automatically downloaded to your computer and can be viewed in Internet Explorer and other programs.”